Relationships

Are We Okay?

My favorite aspect of my most recent romantic relationship was our level of communication. Both he and I are exemplary at interpersonal communication in romantic contexts, and one of best ways we kept our relationship fortified was with three simple words: (more…)

She Cheated With Two Men in One Day!

Listening to the radio the other morning, a woman explained how her boyfriend recently caught her cheating on him — twice, in the same day. She and he shared a studio apartment, and he came back during his lunch break one afternoon to find her having sex with someone. He left the scene and returned to work, only to come home hours later to find her having sex with a different person. (more…)

Don’t Take This the Wrong Way

I hate that phrase. Oh, how I hate that phrase. To caution someone to not interpret something “the wrong way” is to imply that there is a “right way” to think: the speaker’s way. The phrase assumes a position of entitlement that blames the listener for not understanding the speaker’s intention. But, that’s just it. (more…)

Secret-Keeping vs. Selfishness: That Time I Knew Too Much and Picked the Selfish Choice Anyway

I’ve come into sensitive information that I’m not supposed to have about one of my dearest friends, and I feel simultaneously guilty and hurt — guilty because I wasn’t supposed to know the information in the first place and only came to learn it because I specifically fished for it, and hurt because, for some reason unbeknownst to me, my friend deliberately withheld this information from me, thereby disabling me from being a potential emotional resource for her.  (more…)

The Breakup Artist(s)

My partner and I broke up two weekends ago, and although we both feel the release and pseudo-freedom of a typical breakup, neither of us feels particularly sad. Our mutual friends are more upset about this than we are. I can honestly say that our breakup was entirely mutual. It was simply time to let “us” go.

Liberally throughout our relationship, we had progress evaluations, similar to those which people experience at their places of business. We would talk about the way things had been going, what we liked, what could use improving, and what direction we wanted to be heading.

Sometimes, we would have these talks because one of us had an improvement to suggest. Other times, it was simply because we hadn’t had one in a while. With both circumstances, we each appreciated that the other cared enough to listen and actively participate. It always felt collaborative and made our relationship stronger.
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(Borrowed from Elsewhere) If You Get Married, Will You Take His Last Name?

This post hit especially close to home for me, as this is an emotionally-charged topic which I have discussed at length with numerous romantic partners, friends, and family members. Goodness forbid that some of us value our individual identities as well as our familial ones. I say it’s high-time to ditch the name-change-for-women expectation.

ShoutOut! James Madison University

Marriage. As a 21-year-old college senior, that’s something that feels incredibly far away. But realistically, if I end up getting married (which is something that I want to do), it will probably be sometime in the next ten years, especially if I want to start having kids in my early thirties. Of course, many people my age are already married or engaged, which is not in my immediate plans, but to each their own. Whenever I see someone new who gets engaged or married on social media, I see dozens of posts that say “Proud Mrs. [insert his full name here]!”, “Can’t wait to be a [insert his last name here]!”, or other exclamations. This got me thinking: Will I change my last name when I get married?

120178579 gettyimages.com

Quick note: I’m going to be speaking in a heterosexual context because I am heterosexual so that’s what I’m most familiar with and because…

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Ultimate Cuteness: Cuddling Bros

Introducing the next best photo collection of absolute adorability, right after baby animals. Cuddling is SO good for the brain, as well as the soul. A little extra cuddling each day would do wonders for all of us.

cuddlers

See the collection here: http://www.queerty.com/the-ultimate-collection-of-cuddling-bros-photos-20140503/

Hasn’t She Seen Mean Girls?

In high school, I used to joke that my friends and I dated like we were Amish. We tended to stay within our own group, and as a result, many of us ended up dating the same friends as each other, almost on rotation.

I have yet to figure out why I was the only girl within my group to get grief for dating my friends’ exes. We all did it, so why was I singled out? My boyfriends received no grief because they’re guys; they can’t help themselves. They’re slaves to their anatomy, I was taught. But girls… Well, we should be thinking clearly because we know better. (Ha.) (more…)

I Love My Gays, Just Not When I Can See Them

My alma mater has a week every April set aside to celebrate our LGBTQ students and raise awareness to the fact that, yes, they do exist. The event is widely celebrated, particularly for the day when hundreds of free “Gay? Fine by Me.” shirts are given out. I had to wait two years to get my hands on one; that’s how high the demand is. They’re a treasured commodity. After all, what’s college without a few politically active t-shirts? (more…)