I was recently at a friend’s house for a game night, when, as my favorite social gatherings do, someone inadvertently brought up the subject of kink (i.e., less conventional sexual interests and/or practices, including BDSM, fetishes, etc.). This person had misheard someone else during a word-game and thought they had said “daddy,” instead of whatever the word actually was. Some of us chuckled, but she then expressed disgust for incest fantasies, in general.
I was surprised that no one else volunteered opinions, so I casually remarked, in a joking tone to keep things light-hearted, that we do not kink-shame in that basement. My jest was met with a spirited “thank you” from another guest, and then the conversation topic was promptly changed.
Presumably unbeknownst to the woman who initiated the conversation, at least half of that crowd is somewhat kinky. Of the attendees present while I was there, three of us consider ourselves kinky, one is kink-curious, one prefers playing a submissive role in non-kinky romantic relationships, and two have had incest fantasies for extended periods of time.
For anyone curious, incest fantasies often (but not always) overlap with interests in dominance, submission, and discipline. Daddy-daughter, mommy-son, and other family-themed role-playing dynamics are not uncommon among kinksters.
Even casual references to this type of role-playing happen in our everyday lives. For example, while vacationing to Las Vegas with close friends a couple of years ago, my friends and I attended a “bar crawl” excursion on one of our final nights in the city. During our outing, we met a sober young man tending to his soon-to-be-recklessly-intoxicated best friend, whose birthday was that day, and who was determined to have a night he would not remember. Throughout the night, the sober man chaperoned our group to ensure that not just his best friend, but also each of my friends, too, returned to the party bus before departure to and from the various club destinations. As a result of his helpful role, one of my friends elected to coquettishly address the sober man as, “Daddy,” all night.
As I’ve written before, and as I frequently say, sexual fantasies are generally harmless.
Fantasies do not become problematic until you either cannot continue with your regular, everyday life because your attention is wholly consumed by the fantasies, or as soon as you start expressing the fantasies in ways that unfavorably impact and/or harm yourself or other people.
Fantasize about anything you want, even taboo ideas. Fantasies can be explorative, can help people learn to cope with a multitude of stressors and past experiences, and can be excellent outlets to express creativity.
If you choose to take it a step further and act out your fantasies, as long as you are exploring them with fellow adults, everyone involved enthusiastically consents for the entire duration of each activity, safety is maintained, and no permanent harm is risked, go for it!