Go Fuck an Egg: My New Favorite Boytoy

At the Widener conference I attended last fall, I was given two free sex toys: The Lelo Lily, about which I’ve already raved, and the Tenga Easy Beat Egg. The time now has come to sing my praises for that nifty egg — with photos!

First, check out the outsides of the eggshells. I was given the below left egg during the conference and have subsequently purchased a six-pack of other egg patterns, which is where the wavy one originated.

Eggshell frontsEggshell backs

If a silicone jellyfish and the fleshiest part of your inner cheek made a baby, that baby would be a Tenga egg. As you may imagine, they are SO MUCH FUN to squeeze and squish.

During use with a generous amount of lubricant (I recommend Sliquid), they sound like Dr. Zoidberg slurping, which adds to the whimsy of the experience, overall — at least for someone like me who prefers to be grinning throughout any bedroom romp.

Exteriors

The eggs are especially brilliant because they’re not typical masturbatory sleeves. By capping off one end of the sleeve, the egg-shape allows users to both create and vary pressure on the head of the recipient’s penis. Pulling down creates more pressure; up, less.

In use

So far, I’ve had the pleasure of testing two eggs on two partners. Partner #1’s egg was somewhat thin, and Partner #2’s — which looks to me like a horseshoe crab covered in whipped cream — was notably thicker.

Partner #2 burst through his egg on our first use, as you can see from the tear in the upper left tip of two of the photographs in this post. Partner #1 has subsequently torn through his egg, too, after a few additional uses on his own.

Here are how the insides of both eggs look:

Interiors

Each type of egg has a varied texture inside and is designed to create a unique experience for the recipient. Last time I checked, there were at least fourteen different types of eggs. Below is an example of some of the eggs’ textures (from Amazon):

http://www.amazon.com/Tenga-Easy-Beat-Egg-Masturbator/dp/B002DE6SWA

Neat, right?!

For both partners, I used the same general technique. With one hand, I’d use the inside tip of the egg to massage the head of my partner’s penis, and with the other hand, I’d hold the rest of the egg with my fist and, with a swivel of my wrist, twist the egg down my partner’s shaft in a spiral.

With Partner #1, I emphasized the sensation on his penis’s shaft, and with Partner #2, I emphasized the sensation on his penis’s head.  This may be why Partner #2’s egg ripped more quickly than Parter #1’s.

Their verdicts

Both men enjoyed their eggjobs and experienced great orgasms, they reported.

Partner #1 said that his eggjob felt like how he imagined fellatio would feel before ever having experienced it.

Partner #2 admitted that it was the first time a partner had ever successfully helped him orgasm from a handjob.

After each experience, I let the men keep the eggs to use on their own. However, they both reported that they preferred the use of the eggs with my hands, so this may be a better toy for use with partners than solo.

My verdict

Highly recommended! Yes, they are noisy, and yes, they are a bit silly, but they’re inexpensive (around $6 an egg on Amazon, and up to $10 an egg at sex toy shops), travel-friendly, reusable, and downright fun. Bonus points for easy clean-up, too.

———————–

2 comments

  1. I can almost imagine how it would feel! I’m just picturing the awkward shapes that I’d discover when I was done squeezing it. I don’t know why I’m like that but I feel empowered with a tight grip. I’ll let you know if I actually buy one.
    -Amber

    Like

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